Monday, August 21, 2006

Colo(u?)red Folks on Planes!

British "holidaymakers" faced a traveler's worst nightmare when they were shocked and dismayed to find a couple of colored people on their plane. These two coloreds--who somehow had gotten passports and full British passports despite the dark nature of their skin--were seen engaging in extremely suspicious behavior such as talking in some undeciferable colored person tongue, looking at their watches as if to check how long it was taking to take off, having long hair and being unshaven, and being the target of veiled racist slurs.

Stunned by the flight crew's eagerness to fly despite the presence of these un-pale intruders, the passengers heroically took matters into their own hands by muttering unfounded allegations under their breath and making accusatory statements about the colored men. It goes without mentioning that of course, being good (non-pigmented) English folks, the travelers did not directly mention that these colored heathens were, in fact, colored.

Finally, thanks to their efforts, the colored men were escorted off the plane by police to be lynched in the court of random pass-by conjecture. This vindicated many of the passengers in the decision as the men did not struggle or resist, almost as if they were resigned to the fact that their skin color made surrounding people want to jump out of their skins. As we know, any good (melanin-deficient) citizen would struggle mightly if wrongly accused, as no one of importance has even been charged or worse killed for resisting the will of law enforcement officials.

Despite the resultant delay, soon all of the travelers were able to resume their flight schedule as the plan took off just a few hours late and minus those talking, watching-checking sand-niggers who were actually of South Asian descent.

Of course we can all be relieved to know that the situation resolved well: In this case, the unfittingly dark folks were not allow to fly the friendly skies and the only outcome was positive: A bunch of brave British men and women learned a valuable lesson, "Sand-niggers can come from Asia too!"

But can we always count on heroic civilians acting on their own will to advert disasters? What happens the next time some person WHO DOES NOT BURN IN THE SUN decides to check his watch on the runway?

This might sound harsh, but these are desperate times we live in. Sure, in the past we never needed to hold slaves, commit genocides and generally subjugate other people, but now that the terrorists have come along and they are not the color of freshly squeezed milk, we must adjust to our environment.

I'm tired of these motherfucking coloreds on these motherfucking planes. --->I'm not a racist<---Some of my best friends are colored, but the last thing I want to see when I am about to hurdle through the atmosphere is some colored person next to me talking or eating a sandwich or some slanty-eyed chink who might be hiding some explosives in their eyelid crease.

Sure, in this PC era, it's not a pretty solution. But let me ask you an honest question. Would you rather take away some colored person's rights and not lose any of your own whatsoever, or would you rather be BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS?

Sure, Michelle Malkin and Ann Coulter and Jonah Goldberg and the rest of us will miss our colored travel companions, hell, we might even miss Michelle Malkin, but it's all for the safety of the (properly tinted) citizens of our (white) nations.

7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice, I dig the sarcasm

5:20 PM  
Blogger Danger said...

Made me laugh. I'm going to link it in my blog because I'm too lazy to find news for myself today.

1:55 AM  
Blogger Ironcheffie said...

Have you even SEEN Snakes on a Plane?

4:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have there been any recent incidents where a white person wanted a Chinese person off of a plane? What about a Mexican? What about an (non-Muslim) African ?

You're making this into a "white people are racist" thing, but the evidence doesn't seem to support that view. It seems that white people, and various colors of people for that matter, are nervous when people who look like they follow the "religion of peace" are on their plane.

4:15 PM  
Blogger Gar said...

^HA.

Numerous incidents have already happened where non-Muslim, non-Arab people have been thrown off planes (such as British Asian PILOT being refused to fly on a plane).

People's paranoia and racism already are running rampant under the guise "security"...

3:06 AM  
Blogger xian said...

IC:
I don't need to. It's like Jesus--never seen Him except for the phony knockoff images, but I still believe in His greatness...

12:57 AM  
Blogger Ironcheffie said...

It's Samuel Jackson at his VERY VERY best. It is so fucking good

4:45 AM  

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